


All the Things I Want to Say

by CorruptedReality



Category: Eddsworld - All Media Types
Genre: Boys Kissing, Drunkenness, Friendship/Love, M/M, Party, Peer Pressure, Secret Crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-14
Updated: 2019-07-14
Packaged: 2020-06-27 21:08:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19797796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CorruptedReality/pseuds/CorruptedReality
Summary: Tom has had feelings for Edd since high school, he's been doing his best to suppress his feelings but they only got stronger. The boys decide the throw a party at a lake house by the beach, when Edd gets drunk, Tom spends the night taking care of him





	All the Things I Want to Say

"I love you..."

Tom whispers as he stands at Edd's door while he sleeps. Tom closed the door behind him then clenched his fist to his chest. His heart was slowly racing, Tom let out a long sigh. 

Edd was always happy, no matter what the situation, he kept a bright smile with purity that most people dream of. Of course he felt pain, anger, and sadness but he always fought to keep smiling to remind his friends that a smile will be your light guiding you through a path of darkness. 

Tom had a completely different outlook on life, he was so emotionless and numb from all the alcohol he drinks that he doesn't really know how to feel anymore. He hated everyone around him in some way, but the one person Tom never hated was Edd. 

Edd always tried to make his friends happy, even if meant giving shirt off his back or lending his bed to someone who needed it that night. In a world filled with so much negativity and cynicism, Edd was a very refreshing beam of light for the boys. 

Tom met Edd in school, he always remembered him as the guy who was always seen with a pencil and paper in hand. Despite Edd being as kind-hearted as he was, it was never enough to shrug off assholes. Jocks and such would harass Edd and call him ugly, untalented, and generally a useless piece of shit. 

Tom heard Edd crying in the bathroom stall one day, clinging his most valuable possession, his artbook, while tears poured down his face. Tom was one of the asshole kids but he never bullied anyone because he always used his wit and words to shut people down. Seeing Edd in tears was a new thing for all the boys since Matt and Tord would always sit with Edd during lunch while Tom sat alone. Tom stayed in the bathroom talking to Edd until he calmed down, it caused him to be well over an hour late for class. 

Since then, the boys have been as close as brothers, along with all its fights and good times. Ever since the bathroom incident, Tom has felt some kind of connection with Edd, not like a brother. Tom has never been expressive about his emotions to any of the boys, as far as Matt and Tord were concerned, Tom was an asshole but he was funny about it in their eyes. For the most part, it's true, Tom was an asshole and he'll fully admit it, he would always be softer on Edd than the others. 

Lately, Tom's feelings have been getting stronger for Edd and has been avoiding him unintentionally. Tom built up an image that he had no fucks and was born done with everyone's shit. Of course Tord was no stranger to Tom's usual attitude, considering he hates Tord more than anybody. While he tolerates Matt a little more, even Matt is never safe from Tom's wit. 

It was a stormy day and all the boys were trapped inside for the day, Matt was surfing through channels, Tord was on the couch fighting sleep, Tom was sunk into the couch, with a flask in his hand, and Edd was drawing on his drawing tablet. 

"The storm seems to have picked up in the past hour and we advice that you stay indoors and don't try driving in the downpour..." The TV announced on the weather channel. 

Tord sighed, "Great, stuck in the house. So many bodies to claim tonight and I can't get to 'em," he said.

"Yeah, it's real great, I'm stuck with Tord in the house all day," Tom said, he took a swig from his flask. 

"And there's not a single thing on TV that isn't talking about the weather," Matt cried. 

"Aww come on guys, it's not so bad. I mean, I like the sound of rain, it can be really relaxing," said Edd. 

Thunder and lighting clashed when suddenly, the whole room went dark, Matt screamed, Tom slapped Matt to quiet him down. 

"Calm down, you pansy, it's just a power outage." 

Matt rubbed his red cheek as his eyes teared up. "That really hurt, Tom..." he said.

"Come on Tom, be a little nicer to Matt. I mean it was a sudden power outage, it makes ya jump a little," said Edd. 

Tom sighed and took another swig from his flask. 

"Well now that the power is out, what are we supposed to do now?" Tord asked. 

Edd started thinking and looking around, he saw a big stack of board games. He then turned his attention to some paper and pencils. He then turned to the kitchen. 

"Hmm, I'm sure we could find something to do, I just don't know what," he said. 

"I got an idea, let's play spin the bottle," said Tord. 

"Ooh, that sounds like fun," Matt exclaimed. 

Tom rolled his eyes. "Any excuse to lock lips with one of us, huh?" He said. 

"It's not so bad Tom, besides just three players isn't very fun," said Edd. 

Tord chuckled and grabbed an empty coke bottle and sat down on the floor, Matt joined Tord on the floor, Edd followed after him. 

"Come on Tom, you might as well," he said. 

Tom sighed and sat down with the rest of the boys, legs crossed and arms folded. 

"Well friends, who goes first?" Tord asked. 

"Ooh. I wanna go first!" Matt exclaimed. He placed his hand on the bottle and spinned it. The bottle landed on Edd. Tord and Matt both stared at him. Edd looked at all three boys, some sweat started to come down from his forehead, he leaned towards Tom. 

"I guess it's gonna be you," Edd said. 

Tom was frozen, an excuse to kiss Edd. Tom's heart started racing, the beating got faster as he leaned closer to Edd. He held his breath and just before their lips could meet, the light turns on. Matt jumped. "Yes!" Tord cried. Tom exhaled, Edd stood up. 

"Look at that, the lights are back on," he said. Tom was clenching his chest while breathing heavily. 

Tord chuckled, "What's wrong Tom, smoking cigarettes finally caught up to you?" 

"You look like you're having a heart attack," Matt said. 

Edd kneeled down and pat Tom on the back. "Are you okay, Tom?" 

Tom's heart picked up speed as he faced Edd, their faces were very close, lips inches away from meeting. 

Tom shook his head and stood up. "I uh...I just need another drink..." he said. Tom got up and a fresh bottle of smirnoff, he opened the bottle and drank from it. 

"I think I need to keep my distance from Edd..." Tom thought, he looked back at his non-friends and Edd still playing spin the bottle. Tom sighed and looked up at a picture of him and Edd at the first party they went to. Edd is holding up a drunken Tom, Matt took the photo since he's obsessed with pictures, mostly of himself. Tom smirked at it and made his way back to the group. 

"Well now that the power's back on, I can finally use the kitchen," Edd said. "Who wants bacon cheeseburgers for dinner?" 

"Yes please!" Matt and Tord exclaimed. 

"Tom? What about you?" 

"Oh yeah, sounds delicious." 

Edd flashed a wide smile and made his way to the kitchen. Tom sat down on the couch and sunk into it, he took a drink from the smirnoff bottle and sighed. Matt turned his attention towards Tom and gave him a puzzled look. 

"Is something bothering you, Tom?" Matt asked. 

"Matt if I wanted you to know, I'd tell you about it," said Tom. 

"You just look like you have something on your mind?" 

"It's none of your damn business, is what's on my mind." 

Matt frowned. Edd started frying up the bacon. Tord stood up and grabbed his blue Red Army coat. 

"Well, screw the weather, I'm going on a little business trip," said Tord. He picked up a gun and blew a kiss to Tom and winked. Tom flipped him off as Tord walked out the door. Matt chuckled, Tom glared at him, Matt quickly quiet down. 

After several minutes, Edd presented the finished burgers to the boys. They each grabbed one and began chowing down. 

"So Edd, you checked the mail, right?" Matt asked. 

"Uh yeah, our five year high school reunion is coming up," said Edd. 

"Do me a favor and throw mine in the shredder 'cause I'm not going," said Tom. 

"But I was hoping we'd all go, it'd be cool to see our old friends again, maybe even our enemies and see if karma smacked them in the face." 

"I guarantee you guys, there will not be a single person there I wanna see." 

Matt and Edd frowned then looked at each other then back at Tom. 

"Tell ya what," Matt explained. "Why don't we throw our own little party? It would be fun, and we don't have to be stuck in a crowded place because frankly, I don't wanna see anyone either. We could have it on the beach, we could rent a lake house." 

"That sounds like a great idea," said Edd. "But will there be drinks? Like alcohol? Because you guys know I don't drink." 

"What the hell would we do if we don't have alcohol? Sit around with a thumb up our asses?" Tom asked. "I'm bringing alcohol, you guys either drink it or don't." 

"So is it settled, guys? Beach party with the boys?" 

"Hell yeah!" 

Matt and Edd held up their coke and water, they both looked at Tom. Tom sighed and joined his smirnoff bottle with the other boys' drinks. 

After a week of preparation, the boy settled down into the rental lake house. Plenty of space and a beautiful view. Tord peeked out the window to check on the beach. 

"Hey you guys wanna go hang out by the beach?" Tord asked. 

"I suppose it couldn't hurt to check it out after all, we're gonna be here for the weekend," said Matt. 

"Eh, looks like there's people there. I'm good here," said Tom. 

"I'm gonna hang back too. Besides, I really wanna take this in. This place is gorgeous," said Edd. 

"Oh well, sucks to be you guys, we're going." Matt and Tord took off to the beach. Tom shook his head and took a swig from his flask. Edd chuckled. Tom looked over at Edd, he licked his bottom lip then leaned back. 

"You know, Edd. You don't have to stay here. Don't let me keep you from having a good time," Tom said. 

"Oh I don't mind staying back, really. I mean we kinda just got here and I wanna rest a bit. Besides, sometimes it's nice just being you and me," Edd said then flashed a smile. Tom smirked back. 

An few hours passed, Tord and Matt returned with a few guests from the beach. Various alcohol was all over, plenty of food, and music blaring. Tord was flirting with one of the girls that him and Matt brought over. Matt was dining on the treats Edd made. Tom sat at the kitchen counter, drinking vodka shots. Edd looked around the drinks. Tord walked up to him and put his arm around him with a glass of scotch in his hand. 

"Edd, we're an hour into this party and you haven't had a drink?" Tord asked, giving Edd the scotch. 

"Tord, you know I don't drink," said Edd. 

"Nah, fuck that. Tonight, you lose your drinking virginity. Try the scotch, it's really smooth." 

"Tord if he doesn't wanna drink it, don't force him to," said Tom who was visibly annoyed with Tord. 

"Says the guy who drinks alcohol like water. Now come on Edd, you gotta try at least one. If you don't like it, you don't have to touch any more. If you like it, I gotcha covered." Tord put down a bottle of scotch in front of Edd. 

Edd stared down at his glass, then looked at Tord, Tord nodded. Edd took a deep breath, closed his eyes and downed the drink. Once it was gone, he began coughing violently. Tord chuckled, Tom sighed angirly while glaring at Tord. 

"Good, huh?" 

Edd was still coughing, he started pounding on his chest until he was clear. "Other than damn near choking me, it's not a bad taste. It is really smooth, you were right," said Edd. 

"Well, my work here is done. Here, lemme give you a refill on the house." Tord refilled the glass full of scotch and handed the glass to Edd then walked away. 

Tom watched as he walked away, he shook his head. "Such a jackass..." he muttered. 

Edd downed his second drink and started up his coughing fit. 

"Edd," Tom said, turning his attention back to Edd. "Edd, don't drink it all in one go, you take sips here and there so it lasts longer. You're not ready for taking big drinks like that." 

Edd licked his lips after hacking. He rattled the ice in the glass. "Oh look at that, I'm empty," he said while slightly slurring. He carefully refilled the glass with the scotch Tord left behind. 

"Edd, you don't have to prove anything by drinking, you know Tord's a jackass," said Tom. "You can stop, you know that right?" 

"H-hey, I don't wanna stick out like a sore thumb here and be sober. I might as well have my first drink and see if I like it enough to do it again," said Edd. 

Edd this time took a sip of scotch. Tom looked behind him, only seeing a crowd of people dancing and drinking. 

"I'm gonna kill Tord, I swear," he said. 

"No...don't kill Tord. He's my friend," Edd muttered while struggling to stand straight. 

"No Edd, if Tord was an actual fucking friend, he'd respect the fact that you don't drink and wouldn't be offering you drinks left and right just to pressure you." 

"Why do you care so much, Tom? You drink all the time." 

"I don't need Tord's help drinking, I've been drinking since before I even met him. But also, I'm not afraid to tell Tord to go to Hell. You really can be too nice for your own good, Edd." 

"Hey...One of us has to be the nice one, alright." 

"Matt?" 

"Man...s-screw Matt..." 

Edd started laughing and stumbling, Tom caught him before he could fall. Edd just kept laughing. Tom sighed in frustration. He looked around for Tord and/or Matt while walking Edd as he took sips of scotch. Tom snatched the glass from Edd's hand and handed it to a party goer they passed by. 

"H-hey, give that back..." Edd slurred. 

"No, you've had enough," growled Tom. 

"Where are we going exactly?" 

"I'm gonna find Tord and hit him with a brick. Look at you, you're a mess." 

"C-can...can we walk on the beach together?" 

"You know what, since he's probably there, you bet we can." 

Edd grasped Tom's arm and held it close while leaning on his shoulder, Tom's face turned red. He suddenly froze in place. Edd nuzzled his face on Tom's shoulder. 

"You are such a good friend, Tom," Edd said while stumbling as Tom walks. 

Tom paused, his heart began racing. He looked to Edd and smirked in an attempt to hide his clusterfuck of emotions. Anger, frustration, and emotions that go deeper than that in Edd's presence. Tom shook them off and focused on his hunt for Tord. He approached Matt in the front yard of the lake house. 

"Matt," Tom cried. "Where is Tord, have you seen him?" 

"Sorry Tom," said Matt. "Is Edd okay?" 

"Hey when did Matt get here?" Edd chuckled. 

"Fucking Tord thinks Edd should drink and he gave him scotch and now he's out of his mind. Now I wanna beat the everloving piss outta him for this." 

"Oh, I saw him head to the beach." Matt pointed to the beach. 

Tom sighed in relief then noticed the side Edd was on wasn't warm anymore, he turned to that side to see Edd was gone. Tom and Matt both looked towards the beach and saw Edd stumbling to the beach while laughing. 

"I swear to God, if Edd gets hurt, I'm gonna gouge Tord's eyes out," Tom growled. 

"I don't get it Tom, I've been drunk like that before and even a little right now but you've never been worried about me before." 

"Edd's different, Matt. Much different." Tom gave Matt a pat on the shoulder than ran after Edd. Edd stopped in front of the water, as he was about to fall, Tom ran farther to try to catch him. Tom managed to lock one hand with Edd, then the both of them went down, Tom was on top of Edd. Tom froze and his face turned red. Edd started laughing. 

"Do you wanna make out with me?" Edd asked. 

Tom's heart started racing again, he clenched his chest and used his other arm to lift himself up. 

"Edd, as much as I would love to be alone with you, I'm not doing anything to you while you're like this," Tom said. "You know what? Screw Tord, I'm just gonna bring you to bed."

Tom picked himself up and helped Edd up, Edd let out a loud burp and then laughed. Tom walked Edd up to his room and sat him onto the bed. 

"Okay," said Tom. "You stay here, I'm gonna get you some water."

Edd chuckled. "Why can't I go with you?" 

"Well for one, it's getting kinda crowded and you're drunk. I don't want you to hurt yourself. If anyone gets hurt tonight, I hope it's Tord. So please stay here, I'll be right back." Tom shut the door behind him. 

Tom slipped past the crowd and into the kitchen. As Tom began filling a glass with water, Tord placed his hand on his shoulder. 

"Hey man," he said. "Matt said you were looking for me." Tord took a sip from his drink. 

"You really think you're cute?" Tom asked. 

"I wouldn't say cute, just having a good time man. Hey tell Edd I got another bottle of scotch for him" 

Tom pinned Tord against the wall. "Listen here asshole, I don't want you anywhere near Edd for the rest of the night. You should know as well as anyone that Edd doesn't drink. He didn't have to drink tonight, but because you're a prick, Edd's fucked up in his room." Tom picked up the glass of water. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna give this to Edd and if I catch you anywhere near him for the rest of the night, I'll smash your teeth in." 

Tom walked back into Edd's room, Edd was sitting up swaying, he turned towards Tom and laughed. Tom handed Edd the glass of water, Edd took a drink from it then sat it down. 

"You know," said Edd. "You can go back out there and keep partying. You don't have to stay in here with me." 

"No Edd," said Tom. "I don't know nor do I care to know the people down there, and truth be told, I didn't wanna do this party anyway." 

"You're so antisocial." Edd chuckled. 

"Hi I'm Tom, nice to meet you. You know I hate people." 

"Come on, if you hated people, you wouldn't be here with me." 

Edd leaned on Tom, he placed his hand on Tom's leg. Tom froze up. He looked away to attempt to cover his blush. He knew there was a chance to express his feelings he's been suppressing for so long, but he also knew Edd was not in the right state of mind. He pushed Edd slightly to get him to lay down. Edd snuggled up under the blanket and laughed. Tom sighed and stood up. 

"Hey Tom..." Edd said. Tom turned to face Edd. 

"Hmm?" 

"Thank you for taking care of me today, I really appreciate it. Even Matt woulda lost his patience with me by now. But thanks for staying by my side..." 

Tom smiled. "No problem Edd, you do so much for us, I figured one of us would return the favor." 

Edd smiled back then faced away and closed his eyes and began drifting off to sleep. Tom stood over Edd and laid his hand on Edd's hair and ruffled it a bit, he grasped his chest as his heart began racing once more. "I love you, Edd..." he whispered to himself. Tom looked around and then bent over, moved Edd's bangs slightly and planted a small, soft kiss on his forehead. 

The next day, the house was trashed, all the party goers were long gone, the boys were scattered all over the house asleep. Matt woke up first, he rubbed his temple and groaned in pain. He looked around the trashed house and sighed. 

"What a mess," he said. "Even for me, this is crazy." 

Tord got up from the kitchen floor and groaned. He walked over to Matt. "Man," he said. "That party was so awesome. Wouldn't you agree?" 

"Other than the pounding headache I have right now, I really enjoyed myself." 

Tom walked out of his room, and joined the other boys. "This place is a wreck," he said. 

"You were running around with Edd all day last night, Tom." 

"I know. I don't think I'll ever forget last night." 

"I'd say last night was pretty eventful for all of us." 

"Hey listen Matt, could we just cut this whole beach thing short, I just wanna go home, that and I'd feel better if Edd was home." 

"Aww, but I'm having such a good time." 

"You and Tord can stay then, Edd and I could go home." 

"You've been pretty protective of Edd all last night." 

"Well, of all you assholes, Edd is the only one I tolerate and actually like. And when a jackass in a red hoodie gives him a drink, I stepped up to make sure he didn't hurt himself." 

"Aww Tom, you really can be a good friend when you want to be." 

Tom rolled his eyes and walked towards Edd's room and opened the door, Edd was still sound asleep, Tom shut the door and sighed. He glanced at the door, he balled up his hand and rested it on his chest. He looked up at the ceiling. "There's no reason for this to be as hard as this is..." he thought. 

Tord handed Tom a trash bag. "We might as well get this place cleaned up. I think we'll just all head back," he said. 

Tom looked down at the trash bag then looked back at Tord then walked off and picked up trash as we walked. Matt and Tord began picking up trash with him. 

"Hey Tom listen," Tord said. 

"What now?" Tom asked. 

"You got me thinking last night and...I'm sorry about giving a drink to Edd. I guess all the alcohol around me did all the talking for me." 

"Tord, I'm not the person you should be apologizing too. Even now, you apologizing doesn't change how I feel about you. Last night was a very firm reminder on why I hate you. So don't apologize to me, apologize to Edd when he gets up." 

After a few hours of cleaning, the house was back to looking as beautiful as it was when they first entered, Edd stepped out of his room, he rubbed his eye as he walked up to the boys. 

"My head is killing me," he said. 

Tom elbowed Tord in the side. Tord jumped then cleared his throat. 

"Hey uh Edd..." said Tord. "I'm sorry for giving you alcohol knowing you don't drink." 

"It's okay Tord, I forgive you. I don't really remember much of last night, just Tom was always nearby. I thought it was nice." 

"I was just making sure you didn't hurt yourself, you're a pretty bad stumbler when you're drunk." Tom smirked, Edd chuckled. 

The boys all packed up their stuff and made their way back home. They put things back into their rooms. Tom plopped down onto his bed and sighed. "Finally, back home..." he said. 

"Broccoli!" Edd cried as he poked his head in Tom's room, Tom jumped then turn over to Edd. 

"What's up, Edd?" Tom asked. 

"I don't feel like I'll be able to fully repay you for taking care of me last night," said Edd. "It must've been hell babysitting my drunk ass." Both Tom and Edd chuckled. 

"It wasn't really that bad honestly. Besides, you're constantly taking care of me and the rest of the boys. But someone had to take care of you when you're not yourself." 

"Well, either way, I don't know how I could repay you." 

"You don't have to repay me, Edd. I'm just glad you were unharmed the whole night." 

"Well...actually, I believe I have one way to repay you." 

Edd stood in front of Tom, put his hand on his cheek and pressed his lips to Tom's. Tom's eyes widened and his heart started racing. Edd slipped a little tongue in and put his arms around Tom's neck. 

Tom finally got what he always wanted, a kiss from Edd, for them to share a bond stronger than friendship, a bond that Tom wouldn't want with any other person.


End file.
